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Old 01-07-2012, 07:38 AM   #1
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The mouth breathers next door

Oh man, the shit these "people" do sometimes makes me wonder if we're not in the midst of a de-evolution or something. OK, so some background first. These idiots are welfare and SSI collecting, food stamp getting, WIC consuming sociopathic fucktards who believe their lot in life is guaranteed by the sweat of another mans brow, because somehow, by simple virtue of bringing a child in to the universe [through carelessness, stupidity or a combo of both] "we" the workers of the world, can afford to throw them a little something so they can stay at home all day and "take care" of their spawn.

Now that you've been properly introduced to the mouth breathers, I'll finish the little news clip.

So, it's been pretty friggin cold for Florida, and since we're less than two miles from the lagoon as the crow flies, and less than seven miles from the sea, when it gets cold, it is a damp penetrating cold that's hard to defeat. Well, not having much money, the mouth breathers had to go MacGuyver when their heat strips broke on the central air/heat in the house. Papa Mouth Breather had the brilliant idea to simply take an electric charcoal starter element and lay it on top of the broken heat strips and turn the unit on fan.

What a genius idea!................NOT!

Mr. Smart Guy thought the best way to secure this red hot coil, which we all know was never designed for continuous duty in the first place, would be to dangle it by it's cord straight down between the heat strips. Well, our genius didn't count on the thing slowly slipping down lower and lower. When it hit the coils, it apparently landed on a corner section, where it soon melted the lead/tin solder, releasing all of the freon in the unit. A cute little ancillary effect was hot lead dripping in to about thirty five years worth of dried up fungus and mold, creating a smoldering mess that smelled like a cross between week old socks and ass.

The entire house smells like this now and they are trying to defunkify [did I just invent a new word?] the place with half a case of febreeze, which makes it smell like perfumed ass.

The funniest part was that they had the sense to unplug the fucking grill starter, but didn't realize the smoke was from the drain pan, which apparently continued to smolder for TWO DAYS, while they sprayed God only knows how much febreeze.

The story ends with a guy from Britts A/C coming to the house, opening the cabinet and showing these jackasses they had a fucking fire burning away in the drain pan, and charging them three hundred and ninety bills for re-soldering the coil set, drawing it down to a vacuum and re-filling it with freon. They still do not have heat strips, because the fan coil unit has been out of production for twenty years, which they only found out after the repair work had been done, and the service tech had returned to the office to try and order one. Had they simply bought a new fan coil unit, it would have been five bills complete, and they wouldn't have to deal with the heatasaurus rex anymore.

Sixty years after denying Darwin his due, by creating a system that rewards incompetence, rampant breeding and laziness, we have proved that no matter how much help you give people, you still can't fix stupid.
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Old 01-07-2012, 09:57 AM   #2
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The Neighbors From Hell? Zombies Next Door? You almost have enough to make a movie... Take a picture and post it here... Hey, Jimbo! You're famous!

Correct, can't fix stupid!
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Old 01-07-2012, 10:27 AM   #3
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They are certainly the neighbors from hell,, but man are they good for some hard core comedy!
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Old 01-07-2012, 11:07 AM   #4
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lol. Sounds like a parable for government. Fuck something up real bad and then just try to make it smell better by masking it with air freshener.
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Old 01-08-2012, 08:24 AM   #5
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Those sound like the neighbors that will become a problem in times of strife.
I wish you the best, i have a load of window-lickers to contend with myself, uncle grampa and the soggy bottom boys.
they are the best reason for buying the OTHER precious metals.

this is closely related to the subject at hand: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow...154615597.html
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Old 01-08-2012, 08:38 AM   #6
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No, HSB, they won't. They will be among the first casualties in the riots.
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Old 01-08-2012, 12:50 PM   #7
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"Mouth Breathers" and "Window-Lickers"...

Ahh, the education that a bearing can get around here!
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Old 01-08-2012, 04:47 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by ancona View Post:
No, HSB, they won't. They will be among the first casualties in the riots.
I have been giving that subject alot of thinking. recent increases in petty crimes (metal theft, vehicle break ins, etc..)in my area. these types are used to living on the edge and outside the law. when a lack of law enforcement and a societal breakdown occurs, i hope enough are like minded to where defense of neighbors occurs and they are the first to go. these type of scum work in packs!
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