JOKE OF THE DAY!?!

Unca Walt

Big Eyed Bug
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Down the road from our hunt club in Northrin Floriduh, there was an ostrich farm -- they sold the meat. I got a whole foot/shin pair from the dross pile.

Brought them back to the camp and went around making giant "turkey" footprints everywhere (dipped 'em in a mud puddle several times). Even across the hoods of a coupla guys' pickup trucks.

Left a trail going off into the woods. Skipped ahead a hundred yards, and started them up again.

Guys were coming back for days, excited about finding more prints 'way out in the middle of the jungle.
 

Edsl48

Fly on the Wall
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From the sad but true joke department

And I’m proud to be Undocumented
Cause at least I know I’m free
And I won’t forget Joe Biden who gave that right to me
And I’ll gladly stand up take my SNAP and live off you here today
Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land, God Bless the USA.
 

Bottom Feeder

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I recently spent $16,500 on this registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow.

I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth so I had the Vet come and take a look at him. He said,, the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.

The bull started to service the cows within two days — all my cows! He even broke through the fence to breed with my neighbor's cows! He's like a machine!

I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him ...
... but they kind of taste like peppermint.
 

JayDubya

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A boy is invited to Thanksgiving dinner at his girlfriend’s parent’s house so that they can meet him.
They’ve been together a while but haven’t had sex yet.
His girlfriend tells him that after he meets her parents they can “get intimate”. So in preparation, he decides to get some condoms at the local drugstore.
As this will be his first time, he doesn’t know anything about condoms and so he asks the pharmacist what he should buy.
The pharmacist explains all about the differences between the brands and after a long chat the boy decides on a large box of “ribbed for her pleasure”.
The time comes for the Thanksgiving dinner and the young couple are seated at the dinner table with the girl’s parents.
The girl is surprised to see the boy has his head bowed down apparently deep in prayer.
She whispers to him, “I didn’t know you were so religious!”
He whispers back, “I didn’t know your father was a pharmacist.”
 
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